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March Madness Mascot Murder Mayhem: Elite Eight and Beyond

19 Mar


Here it is, folks.  If you’re reading this, you should already know the rules and that I am always right.  Without further ado…

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March Madness Mascot Murder Mayhem: Round of 32

18 Mar


Welcome to the next round of the mascot battle royal.  I will assume you are already familiar with how this works, but I will refresh your memory on the few rules in this competition:

  • Indeterminable mascots lose.  No exceptions.
  • The battle to the death takes place on the home turf of the higher seeded mascot.
  • Battles between identical mascots will be won by the higher seeded mascot.
  • Deadlocks will go to the higher seeded mascot.
  • I am always right and your opinion does not matter in this very subjective analysis.
  • You can’t triple stamp a double stamp.

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March Madness Mascot Murder Mayhem: Round of 64

18 Mar

ImageIt is that time of the year again, folks.  It is time to throw aside any logic and research and fill out your March Madness bracket like a man. Fill it out using the only method that makes sense in this world: which mascot would win in a real life battle to the death?  In the interest of time, I will assume you are not a terrible person and you are aware of the NCAA Basketball Tournament.  I must stress that this analysis is very subjective.  Let’s do this thing.

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Sarah McLachlan is too sad

1 Jul

I decided the ASPCA commercial was only sad because of Sarah McLachlan’s song, so I fixed it. Enjoy.


26 May

Being a TV executive is easy.  I could create a primetime lineup in no time at all.  Most of the shows have already been made, anyway.  To make a new show, you just call it a “reboot” or move it to another city.  Check out some of the shows I made. Continue reading

Shows I’m digging right now

9 Aug

When I don’t have anything to do, I like to watch TV. I’m sure you’re like me and don’t like to stray from the usual suspects. I normally stick to Seinfeld reruns and Law & Order. I don’t like discovering new shows because in the end, they will just disappoint me. However, with the DVR, I don’t have to waste my time scheduling an appointment with a crappy show. On the bright side, I did find some good shows. Continue reading